Addiction and Non-Duality ~ Rupert Spira

Addiction and Non-Duality

Question: For a while now I have had some trouble reconciling some of my behaviour with my understanding of the non-dual teaching. The fruits of this path have definitely been self-evident in
ways that I cannot describe. However, in a very honest and worldly sense, I have also been struggling with an addiction to lust and pornography

I obviously feel very conflicted about this. It seems to me that this addictive, lustful behaviour is certainly not in alignment with the truth that non-duality points to. However, when the impulse arises to watch it, my mind creates a convincing dialogue that says, “There is no doer. This is a spontaneous occurrence. Don’t resist this. All is meaningless,” etc.

I then act on the impulse and afterwards the mind rationalises the behaviour with more of this pseudo logic, falsely claiming that it never left awareness. This is, of course, coupled with all sorts of guilt, inadequacy and other afflictive emotions. Commonsense tells me that something is amiss.

I have heard many stories of all sorts of so-called sages, holy men and enlightened gurus who rationalise inappropriate sexual behaviour under a veneer of spiritual truth. How do we, as spiritual seekers, avoid this tragic pitfall especially when we have a deep understanding that this is a path of
acceptance and not avoidance?

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